OBSERVATIONS OF LIFE !!!!!

1. A transvestite is a guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.

2. The difference between the Pope and your boss....the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.

3. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.

4. It used to be that only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling too.

5. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.

6. Definition of a teenager.....God's punishment for enjoying sex.

7. Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

8. Stress is when you wake up screaming and then realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

9. Just remember....If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

10. Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

11. If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

12. Brain cells come, and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

13. Behind every successful man, is a surprised woman!!